funny- but not funny HA HA.

So I'm sitting here. Just wondering. I should be up and having fun- singing, dancing and drinking but I'm sitting in this chair, nursing my mojito and just thinking. Karma is a real bitch. So Karma, seriously? Just.. fuck you Karma. Fuck you. It's not funny, you can stop anytime now.

It's funny how things can change from great to fucking horrible in no time. How people can go from one end of the spectrum to the other in minutes flat. I'm responsible for everything going wrong and I'm not denying it at all. You can hate me, that's fine. Judge me all you want, hate me all you want. I'll pretend I don't care and that it doesn't bother me until I can't anymore. There's a hole in my life where you used to be. Nothing is replacing it because I still hope that someday this will all turn out to be a nightmare and everything will go back to normal. I know I'm just delusional though. Nothing is changing this. Nothing I can do, nothing I can say. If it were that simple, I would've done it already.

This ends the vague portion of the entry....only vague to some though.

Boston was nice, I love my best friend with all my heart and nothing will ever change that. She's always there for me, no matter how bad I fuck up...because I have fucked up a lot. Especially lately, but I don't expect pity or anything from anyone. I'm thankful for everyone who is still here, and sorry for the ones I've lost along the way. As for the fans who approached me yesterday, wow.. I'm so sorry. I honestly do not remember this morning at all so really, I'm sorry. As for the jerks at TMZ, no.. I'm not sorry for calling you intrusive pricks. I do remember that much.


Tonight was spent with an amazing individual. Miss Memphis of SNL. She knows how to show a girl a good time. HAHA, she's actually singing her heart out right now. Gotta love her and karaoke. She's amazing and she was a great distraction. Tomorrow.. well, later.. will be spent with one of my favorite people in the world. A one Miss Garbo Khiell. We will play doctor (lmao) and record our animal cracker massacre. Oh yes, we're hardcore. After that, Monday will be spent dancing along to her amazing skills at her show which everyone should go to! Seriously, go buy your tickets NOW.

Next week will be nothing short of amazing. I get to spend Thanksgiving (and a few days before that) with one of my favorite people in the world. CJ Walker, I'm looking at you babe. He's going to show me around Vegas and we're going to party like there's no tomorrow. Thanksgiving at his place should be interesting as well. Haha, cannot wait. Seriously. So that's what's going on in the life of Spencer. Tell me world, how are you? tell me you're better than I am.

this was typed out from my phone, i'm a pretty good drunk typist. don't lie.